No listen. We need it. This is what we do, remember? When shit’s dark, we laugh about it.
I could talk about what happened today. Let’s see. Tens of thousands of people wrapped in headscarves, waving angry red, green and black banners and screaming about killing Jews descended upon Pall Mall in London.
The scenes are on a par with the Nuremberg rallies, except less stylish. I mean, say what you want about the Nazis, at least they made an effort with the apparel. Anyway, in one video from London there is an attempt at an actual lynching of a (quite dumb in all honesty) man who ran into the crowd with an Israeli flag. And who was the honorable speaker? Jeremy Corbyn! What did we tell you, eh?! Magic grandpa himself! Remember when he used to tell us he liked having his pals in Hamas over for a cup of tea and a McVities Digestive? He wasn’t lying. Did you listen? D’oh.
In LA, similarly, mobs and mobs of people stormed through Wilshire with abounding death cult energy. Also unemployment energy. What jobs do they have when they’re not ogling at terrorists? Controversial take perhaps but was legalizing magic mushrooms in California a good idea?
In similar scenes over in our neighboring Canada, we met this delightful lass. Check out her earrings. I guess those aren't real guns dangling from her ears, they're just tools of resistance, props of joy, friendly bananas, etc, firing bulletts of love, peace, and liberation. Please, watch what a warped mind looks like. Look in her eyes as she glitches furhter into oblivion. Bleep-bleep-bloop-bloop:
In France, the Louvre has closed until further notice. As tiny as she is, even the Mona Lisa is not safe from Hamas (jury’s still out on whether or not Leonardo Da Vinci was Jewish). It’s true: 10,000 police officers have been deployed to protect the safety of France’s Jewish community. There are 450,000 bonkers Jews still living in Frace. The gendarmerie can afford one per 45 Jews. Which definitely won’t stop a pogrom.
Onto our lovely friend Ilhan Omar, the first Somali American to serve in Congress. She never promotes misinformation or egregious lies to cover-up Palestinian terrorism. (That was sarcasm). This week, Ilhan Omar shared an image of dead Palestinian children from Gaza in 2023. Except she posted a photo of Syrian child victims of a gas attack in Eastern Ghouta in 2013. Sorry bestie, busted.
I refollowed Babylon Bee this week. Babylon Bee is doing the best work Babylon Bee has done in a while.
Elsewhere gay comedian Daniel Ryan Spaulding had the best week of his life, adding tens of thousands of followers to his Instagram account, simply by saying no to terrorism:
Big shout-out to Neurotic Jewish Gay who has been coming in hot with the memes, as per uje.
Eden Cohen, being Eden Cohen (ie, funny but also very useful):
Lee Kern, being Lee Kern:
Something apparently people have come to enjoy is Me vs AOC. Let it be known, I don’t usually stoop to toilet humor, but did you see the video this week of AOC desperately trying to justify the human rights of it all in the geopolitics of the Middle East that she has previously admitted to knowing nothing about? Well as everyone suspected it’s true. She farted mid-speech. And as someone who has been called Eve Fartlow for four years online as a means of diminishing my points of view as a proud Jewish Zionist, I took great pleasure in this:
This one is so dumb, and I’m sorry in advance.
And finally, I texted Dave Rubin a Shabbat shalom this week only to tell him that this was the highlight of my week. I still don’t know why it’s so funny. It’s really funny. I mean, is she?
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Thanks for all the bedtime giggles, Eve! Such good stuff.
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